Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Another Jackson Problem

I was lounging around my pool when I was visited by the ghost of Andrew Jackson. It's awkward when I don't know much about the dead person who is visiting me. Dead people are extremely insecure because of their lack of life. I had to pretend to know how great Andrew Jackson was.

I said, "Wow, I am so lucky. I can't believe I'm being visited by the great Andrew Jackson!"

The ghost of Andrew Jackson said, "You are most kind sir."

I said, "To what do I owe this great honor?"

The ghost of Andrew Jackson said, "Your grand offerings of greetings make me humble in my request to savor these waters on your fine land."

I said, "My waters are your waters."

The ghost of Andrew Jackson stripped down completely naked and jumped into my pool. My neighbor happened to catch sight of Jackson's nude state and yelled from his yard, "Could you please put on a bathing suit?"

I said, "But it's the illustrious Andrew Jackson."

My neighbor said, "You can tell Mr. Andy Jackson that I neither appreciated his inhumane treatment of the American Indians during his presidency, nor do I now enjoy the sight of his snow white buttocks."

I thought, "That saves me from having to look him up on Wikipedia."

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