Fame

President Woodrow Wilson's ghost visited me at the library today. I recognized him because my dad is the president of the Woodrow Wilson fan club. I grew up with Wilson's photos around the house. My dad used to say, "If we can't honor Woodrow Wilson, then something's wrong." I would've challenged my dad, but he'd would cut off my allowance whenever I'd say no, and I had a candy addiction to support.

President Woodrow Wilson sat down at my table and said, "I'm sorry about your dad. I hope it helps when I say that it even embarrasses me. My entire philosophy was, "Show up, do your job, and leave." Accolade addiction and praise-mongering weaken your deeds."

I said, "I had a dog named Jamaica. He got cast as the Alpo dog. I spent my days driving Jamaica around to commercial shoots, publicity junkets, and appearances at dog shows. Jamaica thought I was just driving him around to take walks in strange and new places."

President Woodrow Wilson said, "That's a mutt after my own heart."