I arrived in San Francisco today. I went to my motel room, unpacked my deep sea diving suit, and went down to the Bay. I put on the suit, tied the air tube to the oxygen tank and went under water.
It took a few minutes to get used to the murkiness. The first thing I could make out was a school of mackerel. I always love the look of shock on the fishes faces. A lot of them did the double take that you see in old comedy movies.
I walked underwater for a couple of hours. I came upon a whale. The whale gave me one long look. It was one of those 'are you kidding me' looks. I waved and smiled. The whale cocked its head like a dog. I shrugged my shoulders. The whale rolled its eyes and swam on. I kept walking.
I soon found a big old rusty chest. It was covered with barnacles. I figured there must be treasure in it. I have a pretty general confidence that comes in handy in these situations. I opened the chest. It was filled with rusty slinkys. Rather than dismiss them, I took out a metal brush and scrapped the surface of a slinky. Underneath the rust was gold. Slinkys were a common form of currency in the 1200s. I attached the chest to a chain on my belt and I walked back to shore.
I changed into my regular clothes. I took the gold slinkys to Pickerson's Precious Metals and sold them for a good price.
As Nate Pickerson handed me the stack of cash, he said,"Why don't you make it easier on yourself and get a regular job?"
I said, "Nate, if they just wouldn't keep firing me."
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