WWJD?

I had it with my character defects and did a complete moral u-turn by starting to ask myself, "What would Jesus do?" before any activity.

I was on a great three-day wave of good behavior when Jesus suddenly appeared in my car while I was driving.

Jesus said, "Why are you driving so slow?"

I said that the speed limit was 25 mph.

Jesus said, "I wanna go faster!"

So I sped up to 30 mph.

Jesus said, "Are you kidding me?!"

I punched the gas. Jesus yelped in joy. The car was so going so fast that it began to vibrate out of control, and I drove off the road into an abandoned barn.

I was shaken up, and the car was totaled.

Jesus said, "Thanks, that was fun" and disappeared.